My Path to Outer Skinniness

I'm on a blog kick today. Sorry if I'm annoying. For those that didn't see it on my baby blog, I was told by my midwives today that I should be getting 80 grams of protein a day. When I was counting calories, SparkPeople suggested I get 60-127 grams of protein per day. Most days I struggled just to get to 60. So when I was given this task I had a hard time believing I could really succeed with it. I've always been a good student. Whenever I've been given an assignment I work at it and deliver to the best of my ability. That said, it helps when someone gives me a structured task to do. I guess over the course of the day in trying to figure out my meals I realized that even though eating isn't exactly a research paper, I still treat it like my homework. So today I had a piece of baked salmon for lunch. Being lazy like I am, I didn't bother making a "meal" out of this. I just ate some dried mango and pecans a few minutes later. Dinner was a spoon

Okay, I've been avoiding this post all day which tells me I'm being naughty. I need to be walking. I only get to be pregnant right now and it will be over in 6 months and I will say "I wish I had walked when I was pregnant because I would be in better shape now" So I have decided to issue another challenge. It's the walk every day for a 20 minute minimum challenge! I feel like I'm starting to lose some of my muscle tone from dragon boating. I really miss dragon boating. I wish it could be and indoor and outdoor sport so that I wouldn't be putting myself at risk for pneumonia. I suppose the ligament strain probably isn't great either. But I still miss it. And I miss my team! If you're reading this team, I miss you and I miss paddling with you and  I miss drinking beer with you! I've been reading about how you eat affects your baby. Basically you should eat stuff so your baby isn't allergic to it (nuts, dairy, gluten), you should eat less

Just thought this was amusing for some reason. Dinner tonight was: A small pile of leftover mac & cheese with ham. A small pile of leftover green bean casserole. A larger pile of roasted brussels sprouts. About 8 baby dill pickles. About 5 olives. I'm a gourmet lol!

Okay, this probably isn't going to be the most inspiring, but I have to say that I really enjoyed not having to think for one second about what I ate yesterday. First of all, the pressure on my stomach from the crowding of my insides makes it difficult to eat much, so portion control is on my side. Second, growing a human burns more calories, so even if I eat more than I should (and I do, often) I burn it anyway. SCORE! As I have previously mentioned, I really need to start walking. Bad. I have yet to use the water bottle belt thing I bought. Perhaps my trail isn't blocked anymore and I can go walking there. To make myself feel less guilty about my lack of deliberate walking, I have been walking when shopping - like actually walking, not doddling between displays. The leader of my weight-watchers group was adamant that the walking you do when shopping doesn't count. I beg to differ! Moving is moving say I! Last night we stopped at the very crowded Woodburn Outlet Mall

Today I reluctantly weighed myself. Yesterday was a binge-fest that included such classics as waffles, donuts (3 of them), banana cream pie, and oreo cookies. Today is starting to look somewhat similar. Anyway, I wanted the reality check today so as I stepped on the scale I mentally flashed the number 176, 177 in my head. To my surprise it flashed back at me 173. Huh? My baby must be absorbing my calories for me! I can't say that I am actually annoyed with my scale reading..if anything it's good news in spite of myself. What I can say is that I really know better. I know better than to believe that I'm actually healthy with what I've been eating regardless of what the scale says. For the first time in my life I have to use something other than my weight to keep track of my health. This is kind of liberating. However it also gives me that much more responsibility. If I'm not as healthy as I can be, my baby isn't either. The belly keeps growing - I can't b

Well, it's official. I am starting to kind of show. I have very mixed feelings about this. I have been working so hard to decrease my belly fat for so long that it feels like an epic fail to have it growing. At this point, it just looks like the babies growing has forced more of my belly fat up and out. My tummy is not firm at all and at this point it looks like how it did when I weighed 190 pounds. I have to keep several things in mind. #1 - I have a baby growing in my belly! This is normal! #2 - I haven't actually gained all that much weight. This morning I weighed in at 175. That's about 3.5 pounds which really isn't that bad. #3 - I am short waisted and thus any growing I do has nowhere to go but out. I have bought a few small maternity items to sort of smooth out the transition. The problem with maternity pants that don't have the belly band sewn in is that you can't pull them up very well. I know some of you know what I'm talking about! You s

Last night I went to the grocery store and got stuff to top salads with. I also got ginger and lemonade for my tummy and a few other items that are on my eating list from my 100 foods book. I think I've had salad the last four days with my meals. While this probably isn't a complete solution for my bad food choices lately, it's a definite step in the right direction. The lady at New Seasons keeps telling me to eat lots of leafy greens for the folic acid so I need to be eating greens even if I have fried chicken in the same day haha I realize I need to be eating more dairy (which is any at all). I tend to avoid it since it's not my favorite. What I really do like though is yogurt. I realized that if I buy yogurt that isn't non-fat that I actually want to eat it. I got brown cow cream top yogurt with fruit on the bottom. It's sweetened with honey and maple rather than sugar. It's so good! I ate two yesterday, which probably isn't so great, but it's b

Today I ate half a leftover burrito, 3 banana muffins, a bowl of cereal and a chicken sandwich. But when I went through the drive-thru at McDonalds with my nauseated hunger pangs and my strange craving for a $1 chicken sandwich, I made the decision to order the salad. The southwest chicken salad with grilled chicken and no dressing to be more specific. I consider this a win. I've been really bad about remember to think about what I'm going to eat before I eat it. I've been so stressed about how my body feels (my clothes are tight, I feel fat uncomfortable moving around, etc...) that I've been trying to put off my meals until I feel like I have to eat to not be sick. Then by the time I get to food I'm so hungry I eat whatever sounds good cravings included. Well, I'm smarter than that. I know better! So of course I know that I just need to make good choices and eat when I'm hungry - and not way later.

Somehow I've managed to put on more weight in the last few days. I weighed in at 177 this evening. Given, I'd eaten dinner and I always way more in the evening, but this is just plain unacceptable. I feel like a cow. I've noticed that the mentality that I'd built up around food has quickly died. I realize now that I would think quite a bit about what to eat and whether it was what I should have or not. I find myself eating things like tortillas, cheese, pancakes, red meat, and a multitude of other things that I normally don't allow myself to have at all. Pregnant does not equal eat what you want! I bought a waist pack that holds your keys, ipod, phone (or whatever else) and a water bottle to wear when you go walking/running courtesy of a gift certificate to foot traffic from the Run Like Hell. It will be nice because so often I have to figure out ways to carry items when I go walking and end up with bulging pockets. I am trying to be better about walking as often

I feel like I weight 190 pounds again. It's hard to breathe when I move around. I get winded from walking or climbing stairs. My pants are getting tighter. I feel uncomfortable in my own body! The scale was only at 173.3 this morning. What the hell?! This is a bit of a gain - around 2 pounds - and I'm trying not to stress about small weight gains at this point because I'm pregnant for crying out loud. But I don't want to feel like I've gained more weight that I actually have! My eating has to be better. Period. I need to start walking. Period. This is not an option. I only get one shot to have this baby be a healthy baby. Balls.

Last night I decided to do something drastic. I decided to weigh myself in the evening. I always way a few pounds more in the evening than I do in the morning. For one, I've been eating all day and the food adds weight. I'm sure there are many other reasons. Anyway, I weighed myself at 174.6. Honestly it's not that bad. But it is a gain. And at this point in my pregnancy (especially with morning sickness not being bad at all) I have no reason to gain weight. The fetus in my body does not weigh 3 pounds. Nope. Not even close. I've been craving red meat like crazy all week. I think it has finally worn off however because the thought of red meat makes me feel a bit ill at the moment. The problem isn't that I've been craving it or that I shouldn't have it. Honestly, I need the iron! The problem is that I've been using it as an excuse to eat whatever I want. The other night I had a Baja Fresh Burrito Ultimo. It probably has something like 800 calories. I

Like so many mornings, I woke up, went into my bathroom and stepped on my scale. 170.6. My weight is down a little more. This is about another pound down. If I were to lose 2-3 more pounds I would be just under the obese weight level for my height. One more pound and I'll be down 25. On one hand I'm excited to be down a little bit more. This means that I am eating better in spite of myself (probably the lack of fake sugars, trans fats, and alcohol would be my guess), but it also means that I am losing weight while pregnant. The mayo clinic book I have says it's okay to lose a couple pounds in the first tri-mester so I won't panic yet, but I am a bit on alert. I want any weight gain to be because my baby's growing or because of baby related adjustments - not because I've given in to cravings and am eating like a vacuum cleaner! Loss is not my goal right now. Health is. Yesterday I walked the Run Like Hell 5k. I'm pretty proud of this. I've never done

Well, if you haven't heard via facebook yet, I am pregnant! And both my husband and I are super thrilled about it. What does this say about my weight loss program? Well, it's on a temporary stall I suppose. But my healthy program doesn't have to be. And that is why I will continue to blog. I did some research about what I should be doing to stay healthy and what the normal weight gain will be. I'm in the first trimester (about 5 weeks) and my resources tell me that I should only gain 1-2 pounds between now and December. This is a bit of a relief. They also said that with morning sickness (which I don't really have) it's possible to even lose weight! But I'm not holding out for that eventuality. I got this book to sort of help me out. It's called "The 100 Healthiest Foods to Eat During Pregnancy."   It has a list of things for each trimester that you should work into your diet and it explains how each food works and benefits you and your bab

Gnocchi with Wild Mushroom Ragu That's the link for the recipe. It's vegetarian, and the calories can be a bit high with the mascarpone, but it is so delicious! I used Trader Joes Gnocchi to save time and scrapped the fancy tomatoes for diced store brand. Here's the nutrition breakdown: Ragu (with Mascarpone): Calories: 299 Fat: 22 Carbs: 15 Fiber: 4 Protein: 4 With a cup of gnocchi it's about 540 calories, which seems a bit high, but seriously, it's all vegetables. I don't mind eating that many calories of all vegetables. And besides, the taste is worth it! On another note, I half expected a weight gain after a weekend of eating what was available, not moving around much, and been pretty stressed out. I spent the weekend at Camp Magruder with my parents and my sister helping out with the Clackamas High School A Choir Retreat. I ran sectionals mostly and my family made all the meals. I ended up eating more than I probably should have in terms of c

I just put in my calories for the day using the Diet Controller program. I am so happy with myself. I even made what I thought was a fatty recipe (chicken and dumplings Tyler Florence style) and found that it wasn't really as bad as I expected. I can't get over how easy it is to calculate the nutrition for recipes in this program! I tend to avoid tracking because it is so tedious! You have to look up all the nutrition information, write it down, and add it all up. For a recipe with a lot of ingredients, this could take as much as an hour! I realize now that part of the reason dieting has been so hard for me is that I not only have to deny myself things that are fatty and delicious, but I was avoiding foods that I knew would take a bunch of time to find information for. I did my whole days worth of food in less than 10 minutes with this program! I stayed within my calorie range for today. So that is going well. Now I just have to get the exercise in check. This week is going

Okay, so I was going to wait a little bit to report on how the diet controller program is working but I want to talk about it already. I spent probably a good hour or two yesterday entering nutrition information data into the program on the foods I eat regularly. I put in the whole menu for chipotle, a few items from taco bell (yay fresco!), and some odds and ends around my kitchen. This morning I decided I wanted to have pumpkin oatmeal for breakfast - one of my favorite fall recipes ever! So I opened up my computer and started putting nutrition information for my specific ingredients. It has a database of basic stuff, but I like having specific brand information in there. For instance, my Bob's Red Mill thick cut organic oats will probably have more vitamins, fiber and protein than generic oatmeal would. So I added in the ingredients to the database. Then I added the recipe. It's so cool, you can go in to make a food item, click on an ingredients tab, and then add the ingre

Well, I know I said what I was going to do in my last post, it's just been a bit slow in happening. I've decided to try something new. I downloaded this calorie tracker  program awhile ago as a free trial and I liked it, but I decided I could do just as well with my excel spreadsheet. Well, obviously my spreadsheet isn't keeping me on task anymore. So I'm going to try this out. It keeps track of your nutritional balance, it keeps charts and graphs for you, and the best part is that it stores your entries so you can pull them back up easier (something that was annoying with excel). You can also add exercise, measurements, and weigh-ins. I'm looking forward to using it and reporting further on its effectiveness. I've got bowling tonight, but I think I'm going to talk Paul into walking with me to New Season for dinner. We should take advantage of the lack of rain while it lasts! On another note, I've been on a nesting kick this week. For some reason I&

Today I went in to the doctor to get a pre-pregnancy physical. Well, sort of. Really what I wanted was a definite diagnosis for pcos (polycycstic ovarian syndrome) which I've been learning lots about and had suspicion about having. Why does this matter to a weight-loss blog you might ask? Because pcos throws off your insulin levels and makes it very difficult to lose weight. It also puts you at high risk for type 2 diabetes. I may or may not have announced that Paul and I are not trying to not get pregnant...as in, we're not avoiding babies. As I've been reading about what I should do in case I do get pregnant (like taking prenatals, getting more exercise etc..) I ran across a bunch of information about pcos and had great concerns about it. I learned two things from my appointment today. First is that I don't have pcos. Yay! Second is that my doctor told me not to run anymore, but walking is a great idea. I wanted to ignore her advice and keep running anyway (instant Be

I've been feeling rather apathetic lately about being on the weight loss wagon. I had such a milestone with losing a pant size and I thought that perhaps it would push me to keep going. But I feel myself becoming more and more complacent. Got my hair cut today. Notice that it hides the second chin? I haven't tracked my calories in weeks. I should probably do this soonish. I also haven't really been keeping up on my running (sorry Christy) I just don't want to do it at all. I dread it actually. To top it off I added 10 seconds to my time trial for dragon boating yesterday. My time in May was about 1:51. My time yesterday was 2:01, making me the third slowest female paddler on my team. I really wanted to prove that I could keep up with the rest of the girls. I don't want to give up on it, but my zeal for proving myself is a bit dampened given my inability to perform. The only thing that's got me a bit interested in my health at the moment is all the food

I finally got around to loading my run from my iPod. I went on a run last night - if you can call it that - and felt a bit lethargic and defeated. I went to the track by what used to be the YMCA (after driving around for about 20 minutes trying to figure out where to go and to find parking). First of all, I went into  my run expecting to get through it easily. I guess I'm not as over my cold as I wish I was because it was so hard! My throat burned - even with my inhaler - my legs burned, I kept getting shin splints and my calves were seizing up. Besides that it was super humid and I was sweating really bad, and  there were old ladies passing me, and a lady pushing a baby stroller. It was a bit humiliating and miserable. I'm going running again tomorrow night. I really hope I can get through the week 3 run. I was hoping I could move on to week 4, but I want to get through week 3 one more time first. In the meantime, I'm sitting here drowning my sorrows in a vegan brownie

Normally I don't like to post more than once a day. But today is worth posting about. This is the dress that doesn't fit now :( Tonight was date night. Paul and I haven't been out alone together in a long time and I wanted us to get to spend an evening doing something nice. I have this dress that I bought several months back (I got a fantastic deal on it! $90 dress for about $10!) and I wanted to wear it. So I tried it on and it just wouldn't fit right. I then realized that it was probably a bit too big and I was sad because I have yet to wear it, but excited that I might actually be a size down finally! We're both sick so we decided to keep the evening low key. (Sorry dancing friends!) The initial plan was dinner and a movie. We looked up movie times and a place to eat. We got to the place to eat and it was closed for a private party. So we figured we'd try to go to the earlier showing of the movie and get dinner after. I thought we had time before the m

I decided to finally press my luck and run today. I'm not totally recovered, but I can breath through my nose and my throat doesn't hurt anymore. Running produced a lot of coughing and sniffling, and my lungs hurt so bad! It was like asthma on steroids. At least I know that when I am back to normal I'll be able to make it through my run easily and probably will be able to do the first run of week 4 after one more go through week 3. I actually like week 3. There's only 4 run intervals, they're just longer than week 1 and 2. It gives you a bit more time to recover and it's halfway over before you're even thinking about wanting it to be over. Hopefully I can get through the next couple weeks without taking any 2 day breaks between runs. It's hard to keep a routine when my schedule's so erratic! But if I want to not cry my way through the run like hell, I need to push myself!

As you may or may not know from my facebook stati (my choice pluralization of status) I am fighting off a cold. It's not really all that bad I suppose. I have definitely had worse. But I have learned to baby myself when I am ill. I have missed far too many classes and did poorly where I would have done well had I adopted this philosophy earlier on in life. Pushing yourself to maintain your normalcy when you are sick is just prolonging the problem. So it is with this attitude that I contemplate my running routine. This cold is not that bad. My throats a bit sore and I sound like a man. My nose is a bit runny, but I can breathe. So I have to decide if it's better to wait it out a day or two (I believe I will feel better by then) or to try to run while I'm still sick. I've heard different philosophies on this. One is that it's okay to exercise if your illness doesn't affect the neck down. I've done this before and ended up being ill from the neck down later

This day, although still near the beginning, is a great day! "But Bethany, why would you say that?" you might ask me. First of all, it's my mom's birthday and I'm a good daughter so I make that a priority. Secondly today is the one and only day that I will have run w3d1 of C25K for the first time. Many things went through my head followed with the thoughts "oh, I should write that in my blog later!" And it is because of these things that I am writing this post today. So here is the list of problems and the list of solutions. Problem #1: My headphones have been driving me nuts because they fall out every time I start to run. Solution: I wore a thermal headband over my ears. This kept them in, but made my head hot. I will probably have to find a new solution next summer when it gets warm again. Problem #2: My feet hurt like hell when I run!!! Solution: I can't fix this. I've gone through months of chiropractic treatments, lost weight, an

Today is a good day for being on a diet. Why? Because I did really well today, and I didn't even realize it until now. I just calculated my calories for the day thinking that I probably was really near my limit and was pleasantly surprised to find that I'm still a couple hundred calories under my limit for the day. This is awesome considering I have such a hard time staying in my limits without tracking. By the way, polenta is an awesome substitute for pasta. I like it best when it's broiled on each side so it's kind of crispy on the outside. I've been running into something I haven't really experienced before. When I eat something that is blatantly bad for me, I get horrible stomach cramps and pain. Sunday night I decided to have a quesadilla for dinner because I was stuck at work instead of out celebrating with my dragon boat team. Paul had to bring me pepto bismol because my stomach hurt so badly. Today I had a bubble tea - which isn't really all that

Well, after a bit of procrastinating I got my butt out of bed this morning and got out the door! I decided to try to run week 2 of the c25k program just to see if I could. I actually managed to make it through the entire workout! The whole concept of mental training has really made a difference. I think when you spend time around people that understand this and that you respect it helps to adopt their strategies. The trail I like to run, Fanno Creek Trail, is under construction. I had only been walking/running about 6 minutes and I got the the "end" of the trail. I was a bit bummed and when I turned around I caught myself thinking that I should just go back home. I caught myself thinking this sort of thing several times. But I'm learning how to stop this train of thought and to just keep pushing. There is so much you can do if you can learn this skill! I'm going to do the week 2 run one more time and then move on to week 3. I've never done week 3. I've alw

Whenever I go on a diet I'm always happy when I get the results. Eventually the drive starts to wane and then I'm always surprised that I don't continue to lose weight when I stop doing the grunt work. I'm bitter in fact. Bitter that you can really never back down from working hard for what you want. That fact was really driven home the last couple days. I've only been tracking my calories..two days maybe? As soon as I make sure that I'm staying within my range (even if it's at the maximum of that range) I lose another pound. On one hand, I should be happy. One whole pound in two days! On the other hand, I'm kind of irritated that the solution to my weight problem is really very simple and yet so difficult. I can't come up with a different approach or a more creative solution. I can't figure out a way to not do the work to get the results. There is one solution to my one problem and it will always be the same. Eat less - track what I eat to mak

This soup tastes just like German potato salad, but it's soup! Makes 4 Servings Hillshire Farms Turkey Kielbasa, cut into discs 1 Onion, chopped ½ Cabbage, chopped 6 potatoes (whatever kind floats your boat, I used red), cut into ½“ cubes water salt pepper vinegar sugar (splenda) Calories: 335.5, Fat: 8.75g, Carbs: 37.5, Protein: 22.75 Fill large saucepan or small pot halfway with water. Salt and bring to a boil. While the water is heating up, in a separate stockpot sauté onions with a bit of olive oil, pinch of salt and some pepper. When onions are transparent, add cabbage and sausage. Add a few pinches of sugar and a few splashes of vinegar to taste. Add a bit of water to keep it from burning. Turn burner down to low to keep warm. When the water in the first pot is boiling, add chopped potatoes. Boil until tender. When potatoes are done pour all contents into second pot. Add water, salt, and pepper to taste (if you like more broth, add more water). Let it all simmer togethe

So...the girl with the good character. Yeah, she's been missing for a few days. Several days actually. I haven't tracked my calories for probably a week. The good news is that I haven't really destroyed my progress yet. The bad news is that I'm not actively working toward my goals, and I still haven't met them yet. So here's the shake. Tomorrow's Thursday - weigh-in day. It's also the first day of my week for tracking. I'm going to start over tomorrow. Christy called me out of my lackadaisical attitude toward my couch to 5k efforts and challenge me to get my butt into shape in six weeks for a 5k run. Given it's a run where you dress up in an Alice in Wonderland theme, but it's a run all the same. I think I need to do it. So now I have two new goals. Track calories for a week straight and train for a 5k over the next 6 weeks. Anyone else want to join me?

Today I did something brave. Today I sat in the second row during dragon boat practice with a near full boat and our regular coach running practice (I've done it before with about half as many people on board and the captain or one of the leads running practice). It was rather difficult. First of all, the rest of the boat depends on you to keep the timing. If you get off, everyone else does too. Second of all, I was close enough for the coach to actually see my mistakes immediately and close enough that I could hear him tell me what they were. I really had to push myself. Initially I resented all the feedback. I had the coach telling me to fix one thing like the front of the stroke, and then I'd start to slip on another thing like timing and have someone behind me yelling to watch the timing. I realized about halfway in that it was exactly this feedback that was going to make me better. Even though it was a bit overwhelming, I was focused and working hard the entire time. At

Well, I'm up two pounds. 177. It's better than I expected considering how bad I did with my food choices over the last week. I've lost my steam for tracking. I've done a fairly good job at watching myself. I've been eating more fish, I've been taking my vitamins, and drinking more water. I'm trying! But I'm not absolutely certain that I'm staying within calorie limits that will lead to  my success because I'm not writing it down. I reach this point every time I'm on a diet. The point where I don't want to keep doing the same thing that's been working for me anymore..but I'll keep doing most of it. This is when I need to fight through my apathy and really get serious about my progress. This is when it gets hard. And it's important to push through it because if I don't I'll just be back where I've always been. I'm going to start by writing down what I ate today. Character is built by the quality and fervor

Okay, well maybe not death. But severe punishments anyway! I am pretty sure I've gained one or two pounds. The weekend did not bode well for me. We went to the pacific rim festival where I ate a very healthy lunch, but drank a rather unhealthy amount of sake. The enabler then wanted to go to Red Robin for dinner. I tried the lettuce wrapped teriyaki chicken burger sans mayonnaise to try to make it healthier. I'm sure the french fries didn't help much though. Sunday I ate pretty well for lunch. I had a white bean chili courtesy of cash & carry. Dinner was a mess though. We went bowling and the enabler suggested I eat what I want because we don't get out that often etc... I wanted to believe him so I ate tater tots again. I also had beer. Yesterday I did super well. I had soup salad and breadsticks at Olive Garden - under 400 calories if you do it right - and I even did well for dinner. I had leftover salad with a piece of baked salmon. But then I ate a 700 calo

Today I weighed in at 175.8. I found this loss a bit shocking considering what felt like self-sabotage last weekend. I can't believe I've been at this a month. It doesn't really seem like it's been that long, and I haven't really felt like I've been as diligent as I should have been. But I'm 10 pounds lighter today than I was 30 days ago and that feels pretty good! I was noticing my arms in a photo yesterday and I realized they look better than my wedding photos. Here's a comparison: I don't know if it's really all that obvious, but I'm happy anyway. Dragon boating has really helped my arms a bunch too. I did my measurements on spark people as well and my waist, hips and thighs are all about half an inch to an inch smaller. I think in about 5-10 more pounds I'll actually be down a pant size! 

Here I thought the only repercussions of eating naughty food this weekend would be a lack of weight loss. Well, I get to pay more than I thought. The large amount of kalua pork I ate yesterday is taking it's toll on my stomach. My stomach that doesn't get fed this much meat anymore and probably doesn't know what to do with it all. I guess the good news is that I have no desire to eat anything. So returning to the diet is easier!

Okay, maybe not the kind of naughty you're thinking! But I did let myself eat things that I knew were going to be very bad for the calorie counting trek. I ate all sorts of things. I had beer. I had chocolate (gluten free but not butter free brownies are super good!). I had wheat pancakes with bacon and real maple syrup. And, I didn't really get all that much exercise. BUT (and that's a very big but, but a but nonetheless), I was completely aware of every thing that I ate. I knew my almond roca were 200 calories. I knew that the battered halibut and the half a bowl of clam chowder were probably well over 1000 calories. I knew it. But I wanted to enjoy a weekend of eating without making myself sick full and without having to say no to everything. Fat Camp! So now I have to hit the ground running again starting tomorrow. Today's a wash already. We went to the cheese factory - nuff said. But tomorrow! Tomorrow will be the day that I prove that I can relax a couple d

1. I stopped at the restroom in the hotel by the waterfront on my way to dragon boat practice tuesday. There's a full length mirror there. As I came out of the stall to wash my hands I noticed my reflection in it to the side of me. On my way out I stopped in disbelief. I was wearing a very form fitting tank top that dries quickly. Usually I expect to look like a stuffed sausage in it. But I didn't. I had to turn to the side and turn back again to make sure the mirror wasn't at an angle or something that would make me seem thinner. But it wasn't. I actually look better in my clothes. 2. On the way home from dragon boat practice I was thinking about this and also thinking about how I'm tired of counting calories. It occurred to me that I only have to count vigilantly until I weigh what I want to weight. And since I don't, I need to keep doing it. I would be devastated if I gained any weight back. I've reached this point in my dieting many times before. The d

Well, today there is good news, and there is bad news. The good news is that I went a couple of days without tracking my calories at all. I know that the tater tot day was probably well over my calorie limit. But I went back to Saturday and Sunday and tracked what I had left today and found that I had stayed within my limits just fine. I think what's helping me succeed is the sheer terror that I'll gain what I've lost back and have to monitor this closely again. Whenever there is food in front of me and I don't know how many calories are in it, I am actually scared to eat it because it will undo all the work I've done. The bad news is that I have been really fighting the urge to comfort eat. I found out for sure today that Wilson will be hiring within the district and I won't be teaching there. I have been gearing myself for this job since Novermber/December last year when I knew Steve was retiring. It's a terribly difficult blow for me. But I think the

There's this song I used to listen to on an old DC Talk cd that I always think of when I hear the words Will Power . I find it amusing. Yesterday was a weird eating day in the life of Bethany. I was completely not hungry all day. I finally caved and had a slim fast (my new favorite breakfast lately because I'm too lazy to make anything) when my stomach started it's own gurgle symphony. At around 4:00 I realized I hadn't eaten still. So I went to the good old subway in the mall and had me a veggie sandwich and an oatmeal cookie. The cookie was more calories than the whole sandwich. When I got to work at 8 I felt really sluggish and I realized, for probably the first time in my life, that I was aware of how my body was functioning based on what I'd eaten. My blood sugar was low. So I got food in the snack bar. The picture is how the snack bar feels to me. It's the point of no return! It will consume you! I managed to do well for the entree, but I caved and

I was pleasantly surprised this morning when I weighed myself. This marks the end of week 3 of the calorie counting challenge and I'm still hanging in there. At the lowest, I weighed in at 179.1 (there was some ounce changes with different clothes I was wearing, but all at 179). Even though it's only a pound, given my circumstances I'll take it as a win. I am very happy to have this boost of confidence, especially after a weekend of untracked camp food! Yesterday I sort of waited until the end of the day to calculate all my calories. I ended up doing pretty well. At some points of the day I actually had to force myself to eat because I didn't want to cook for one and because I just wasn't all that hungry. When I tallied everything up I was right within my limits. I think I've started getting the hang of this better. I wanted to mention two inspirations that I've had in the last week. Tuesday I went to New Seasons when I got done dragon boating to get a

I'm getting kind of tired of tracking my calories. It's become more tedious than it was originally. I think this is partly because I went three days without tracking. Now it feels like a daily chore. I have incentives however to continue. I may as well just come out and say that Paul and I are starting to research and learn about having babies. ***WE ARE NOT PREGNANT YET***. (everyone always asks whenever I mention the "b" word) Nor do we expect to be for at least a few months if not longer depending on how things work out. There are several factors to consider such as whether I get this job in the fall, whether we can afford the birth we want right away, where we're going to put a baby, and other things as well. That said, I need to get healthy for any of this to matter. My biggest concern at this point is that I might have Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS). I've read about four different books that describe the symptoms and I match every single one of

Well, I guess it will take a couple more days to really gauge how the experiment in non-tracking went. Paul and I went camping this last weekend and I decided it would just be easiest to pack good food options and not eat all day. This was easier said than done. I didn't realize how much of camping is just sitting around and eating. I kept trying to keep a mental tally of what I'd consumed so that I would kill my progress. It was hard! I weighed myself today when we got back and thankfully I'm not up any, but it will be awhile before I'll probably see the real results of my experiment. I have high hopes though. I had a few things that probably worked in my favor while we were there. First, instead of s'mores I took a box of 100-calorie pack twinkies. Roasted twinkie bites are super delicious! And low calorie! I did eat ONE s'more. I feel like this is an accomplishment. Paul probably ate about 6. Second, I hiked roughly 6 miles yesterday. I went on a hike by

In this calorie counting stuff I've spent much of my time google searching nutrition information for foods I eat and then trying to calculate my stats based on what I find. Sometime's it's pretty difficult to make adjustments for portions. Like, if I only ate 3 french fries but the information is for a small fry size, how do I estimate how many calories that is? I finally stumbled on a website that does it for you. It doesn't have everything on it, but what it does have is SO HELPFUL! And, it has pictures of the food so you can make sure that what you're getting facts for is actually what you ate. Check it out! http://www.caloriegallery.com/

Good news #1: Yesterday was a good day. It was the first day of week 3 of the calorie counting challenge. I made it! I'm down 6 pounds in two weeks. Now I just have to keep it up. Good news #2: The second success was a good dragon boat practice. All of the issues I had before are becoming more solvable. I got wax for my paddle. I found out I have a renewal on my inhaler prescription so I can go get that, I got to paddle in the front of the boat which I really loved so I was really able pushed myself. Good news #3: I remembered that we had a very belated wedding gift from my parents friends Ken and Leslie Conachan. They gave us a gift card to Target. So I asked the husband if I could use it for a better bathroom scale and he said sure, so I got a fancy new scale. The thing I was most worried about was that it was going to say that I weigh more than I thought. Luckily our previous scale wasn't as bad as I thought and I am right where I thought I was. The other cool thing

I really need to get a better bathroom scale. It's not that I think ours in inaccurate, it's just that I think it's really hard to read and thus hard to tell which line the dial is actually pointing to. I'm going to say that I probably lost 1 pound this week. Maybe slightly more but, again, it's hard to tell. I'd rather be under-indulgent. This isn't really the shining glorious achievement that I was hoping for. But I suppose after the large weight loss I had from the first week I couldn't expect my body to keep adjusting that quickly. As long as I keep losing, that's what matters. I've been sort of watching sales and pricing out bathroom scales. It's a bit of a draw to figure out what a good choice would be. There's reviews for everything and nobody's really unhappy with their scale. They also vary so greatly in price that it's hard to tell if more expensive is necessarily better. As long as it's accurate and doesn't br

Here's the infamous video as mention in the last post. You really can't see me except for when I'm not paddling. Which is pretty much what I expected. Super. At the very least it's good to see what some of the better paddlers are doing from this angle. Typically I have to go from what I see behind them or next to them. Hopefully I'll be able to integrate some stuff into my paddling. Besides that calorie counting is going okay. Today is Week 2 Day 6. This week doesn't look as promising for weight loss, but I'm not getting heavier so that's a reason to keep at it right?

Well, I was feeling so great about my progress and then my house of cards collapsed ever so slowly. I had the girl at the nail salon ask me if I was pregnant. NO. JUST FAT. THANKS FOR ASKING. This morning at dragon boat practice I kind of lost it. My back hurt because I can't afford to get it adjusted at the chiropractor, I couldn't breathe because my inhaler's almost empty because we can't afford for me to go to the doctor to refill the prescription. The boat was off balance so I had to lean to bury my blade which exacerbated the first two problems more. I also didn't have any wax for my paddle so I had to grip it harder which made me more tense and hurt my wrists. The last insult to injury is that I got seated in the back of the boat where the gunnel curves a bit and the seats are closer together and more narrow. The best part is that our coach filmed us today. I've been really trying to push myself so that I don't get cut from races anymore. I show

I'm sitting here trying to figure out the calories in the food on the happy hour menu at McCormicks because we have plans to go there in a couple hours. I'm kind of debating if it might not be a terrible idea to just scratch this meal from my records and eat what I want. I'm not missing food really. I'm not craving ribs and cheeseburgers. But I kind of don't want to burn out on tracking all of this stuff (and it is starting to get a bit old) and I feel like I deserve a reward that I don't have to put on my spreadsheet. One of the meals at McCormicks. Doesn't it look healthy and delicious?! On the other hand I know I'm going to be worried about it. I've been doing so great at keeping this up and writing down everything I eat with as much accuracy as I can muster. I've also done really good at staying in my limits. It's hard to get enough protein every day without going too crazy on the fat. I just don't want to mess up a good thing.

Well, I have reason to celebrate - I think. I really need to get a better scale. Mine is a dial kind so it's really hard to tell if it's accurate or not. Anyway, I weighed myself this morning and then again when I got home from work just to be sure, but it looks like I'm down about 4 pounds. I'm thrilled! I went to pick up my wedding ring from the jeweler today after I got off work but it wasn't there yet. So I wandered around the mall while I was waiting. I stopped into my favorite store of all time, The Limited, and tried on a couple things just because it was nice to have their clothes fit nicely. I have longer to go so I didn't buy anything, but they have some super cute pink and purple stuff right now! I also ate a chocolate truffle from Godiva which ended up being far less terrible than I expected when I finally got home to count up my calories so far. I am really looking forward to having another week of success. I'm anticipating there being more o

Today marks 1 week! I feel good that I'm going strong. I've never been able to track my progress this successfully. It's good stuff. Today I packed extra food in my lunch so that my lunch would be a bigger meal than my dinner. Strangely, I wasn't as hungry today and I ended up not eating the extra 200 calories I brought with me. It's amazing how much easier it is for me to tell if I'm actually hungry when I haven't really had any refined sugar or high fructose corn syrup. For anyone who doesn't know, hfcs is a sweetener substitute often used in foods instead of sugar. The reason it sucks is that it doesn't satisfy our craving for sweetness naturally and you end up eating more than would normally satisfy you. Normally when you consume food, hormones release and tell your brain that your stomach is full (before you feel like you need a wheelbarrow to carry your stomach around in). Hfcs blocks this hormone so that you can't tell when you're ful

Today went okay. I think I needed to pack more food in my lunch because I felt hungry all afternoon and ended up eating half my lunch before lunch even happened. I ended up low on my calories by the end of the day and had to figure out more stuff to eat that was healthy and wouldn't put me too high. I haven't managed to lose any weight yet sadly. I'm hoping it's just the weather that's making me retain water. I'm pretty happy that I've been doing this nearly a week and have yet to do poorly. Not only that, I haven't been obsessed about food which I think is the key to doing well when you cut back. Yay.

Okay, I never thought this would happen. I'm sitting here right now not wanting to really eat anything else and I haven't even had 1000 calories today. I'm going to make myself a chicken breast since I am seriously lacking protein, but how on earth can I not want to eat everything in sight!? Today was apparently easy. Excel spreadsheet FTW! By the way, if you didn't already know, baked sweet potatoes feel like cheating when you're on a diet and a small one is only 160 calories. And they don't need anything added because they're so flipping good by themselves! * amendment* So, upon further research, I realized after I posted this that I forgot to count some corn salad I had eaten and my morning coffee. Which, after the chicken breast, put me up to about 1300 calories, which has been my daily average. It helps to remember what you ate! So now I'm tracking my food before I eat it!

So far so good. The last two days have been a bit of a challenge, but nothing that I couldn't handle with some determination. I actually have managed to work pizza, onion rings, and beer into my meals! The trick is portion control and anticipation. I knew that we'd be eating out last night so I ate basically just vegetables until then and looked up what I could eat ahead of time so that I wasn't going too far overboard. Today I paddled and I figured that with a two hour practice (that I felt by the end!) I needed some serious recovery food so I allowed myself to eat eggs and potatoes with a piece of toast afterwards. I talked to my coach about possibly doing some one-on-one paddling so I can get better with the technique and feel more confident on the water. He had corrected me on something today that I didn't even realize what he meant for a good amount of time and I would rather fix those kinds of things without slowing the whole boat down while he explains it to me