Skip to main content

Relief and Sad

Well, today there is good news, and there is bad news.

The good news is that I went a couple of days without tracking my calories at all. I know that the tater tot day was probably well over my calorie limit. But I went back to Saturday and Sunday and tracked what I had left today and found that I had stayed within my limits just fine. I think what's helping me succeed is the sheer terror that I'll gain what I've lost back and have to monitor this closely again. Whenever there is food in front of me and I don't know how many calories are in it, I am actually scared to eat it because it will undo all the work I've done.

The bad news is that I have been really fighting the urge to comfort eat. I found out for sure today that Wilson will be hiring within the district and I won't be teaching there. I have been gearing myself for this job since Novermber/December last year when I knew Steve was retiring. It's a terribly difficult blow for me. But I think the fear of fatness has ruled over my need to self-comfort and I've been coping by not eating instead. Not eating and getting lots of hugs from Paul. Good therapy. Oh, and shopping. Also good therapy.

So, while I'm still on the right track, I have this huge bump in the road that's going to be a lot of work to get around.

Comments

  1. Maybe this "bump in the road" can be thought of as a blessing in disguise. You cannot control the job market, but you can control what you eat. Focus on what you can control and leave the rest to fate.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Day 10

I got some much needed me time today. My mom came with me to look at countertops for the kitchen remodel that feels like is never going to happen and then took the kids so I could go to my chiropractor appointment without them. I love my mom.

I have been really stressed about our moving timeline, the start of school, and the money tied to all of it. I feel a bit paralyzed right now, there's not much I can really do until there's a bunch to do at once. It makes it kind of difficult to really enjoy my last few days of summer. So does not eating ice cream. Or anything that gives me joy.

I took advantage of the little bit of "me time" and went to Costco to replace the mass amounts of fruit my kids eat. (yes, I spend my "me time" grocery shopping) I'm already starting to dread having to feed them when they're teenagers. It was a bit more brutal than I had anticipated. Who the hell decided to put the pastries right next to the produce?! Really?! I could h…

Day 3

Today reached 106ºF outside. We don't have air conditioning. It sucked.

We stayed in to avoid the heat and left the house in the afternoon for my chiropractor appointment. I made sure to pack whole30 friendly snacks for me and the kids and took a very large cup of ice water.

I got my results from my x-rays last week and the scoliosis that was under control a year ago is back with a vengeance. (Yay for a year of having no time whatsoever to schedule an adjustment!) The good news is that it's treatable. The bad news is that treatment is expensive and I don't know if I can afford it. Yay stress.

After a very very long appointment at the chiropractor, I decided we should beat the heat at Ikea. We're in kind of a limbo period where I can't really do much to prepare for moving yet, but the Ikea kitchen planning tool online has kept me feeling like I can do something while we wait and I had some questions about cabinets anyway. It's therapeutic. But, yet another sourc…

Why Whole30?

I'll consider Monday my trial-run (although this proved a bit devastating for Charlotte). I didn't realize that pasture butter was only okay if clarified (milk solids are a no-no) and that pretty much all bacon has added sugar.

I procured the book from the library and dug in. Let me just say, this book feels like it was written by real people. There's a whole chapter dedicated to walking you through how you'll probably feel from day to day and I really like that. It reminds me of pregnancy books that tell you how your body may change each month and how your baby is growing. It's helpful to have an idea of how you may react to the changes and why.

"Day 4 to 5: Kill all the things  ...You walk into the kitchen and, upon being greeted by the smiling face of your significant other, you are suddenly overcome with the desire to punch them in the face for being so darn cheerful this early in the morning." They know me.

Having done every diet under the sun and sw…