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Relief and Sad

Well, today there is good news, and there is bad news.

The good news is that I went a couple of days without tracking my calories at all. I know that the tater tot day was probably well over my calorie limit. But I went back to Saturday and Sunday and tracked what I had left today and found that I had stayed within my limits just fine. I think what's helping me succeed is the sheer terror that I'll gain what I've lost back and have to monitor this closely again. Whenever there is food in front of me and I don't know how many calories are in it, I am actually scared to eat it because it will undo all the work I've done.

The bad news is that I have been really fighting the urge to comfort eat. I found out for sure today that Wilson will be hiring within the district and I won't be teaching there. I have been gearing myself for this job since Novermber/December last year when I knew Steve was retiring. It's a terribly difficult blow for me. But I think the fear of fatness has ruled over my need to self-comfort and I've been coping by not eating instead. Not eating and getting lots of hugs from Paul. Good therapy. Oh, and shopping. Also good therapy.

So, while I'm still on the right track, I have this huge bump in the road that's going to be a lot of work to get around.

Comments

  1. Maybe this "bump in the road" can be thought of as a blessing in disguise. You cannot control the job market, but you can control what you eat. Focus on what you can control and leave the rest to fate.

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