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Oh So Emo

I debated about going to yoga. It's one of the only days that they offer the late class, and I really wanted to go for that reason. But about an hour beforehand, I just really didn't feel like going. I also didn't drink any water to prepare for class first. And I lost track of time and started to make cake. So, when I saw what time it was, I decided that yoga was a better choice than cake. The class was really small, and it was an instructor that I really like. I started out pretty strong, but I was having a really difficult time focusing because I kept being distracted by how fat I am. Part of it was that there was this lady I haven't seen in classes before there that was skinny and gorgeous and had the best legs I've ever seen. She looked like she was probably in her late 40's. It was depressing to feel less attractive at 25 than this woman twice my age. I noticed that she was struggling with some of the poses and that made me feel slightly better. But then the headache and the dizziness from not hydrating started to set in and then I let myself get upset. I left the hot room to see if my head would feel a bit better and then went back into the class. I didn't feel like it was the best idea to finish out the sets because I wasn't warmed up anymore and I hadn't done have the poses to prepare for the deeper stretches. I think I'm going to wait until Saturday to go again. Hopefully I can fit it in somewhere between work and a party I'm going to. (happy birthday Darren!!)
I still want cake really bad. But I decided to try to eat salad first and see if I'm still hungry. I'm not hungry. But I want cake. Good thing I'm too lazy to make it now. I decided today too that every time I try to make buttermilk ranch dressing as lowfat as possible, I end up not eating it. So I decided to make it normal so it actually tastes good, and just not use too much when I eat. I also took the liberty of blending an avocado into half the batch. You can't really taste it, but the consistency is really delicious.

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