Skip to main content

Lost my Will to Care

I'm lying on my couch this morning contemplating everything I have to do today and it pops into my head "I should go do the elliptical before I have to go do anything" And then my next thought is, "Meh, I don't feel that terrible in my shorts."

Truth is, yeah I do. And the other truth is that right now I don't really care. A year ago I weighed 5 pounds less than I do right now and I was a bit more toned. Two years ago was the same. Who am I really kidding? The reality is that I will probably not change and no number of small victories has made any difference in my weight.

So, for today, I'm just going to be happy with how I am. I'm going to eat when I'm hungry. I'm going to exercise when I want to. And I'm not going to beat myself up about it.

On a much less dismal note, I've decided that since I'm unemployed and we'll probably be broke all summer, I'm going to find some bike trails and hiking trails, I'm going to make a list of them, and we're going to tackle them one weekend at a time. Not because it's "the healthy thing to do" or because it's "exercise", but because I enjoy it.

Stop trying and start doing.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Things I've Learned from the Sims 3

I've been playing an overabundance of Sims 3 the last few days. It's kind of a weird addiction because you're living life, but you're not living life. Anyway I had a realization that I've had many times already but I had it again. You don't get anything you don't work for.

In the game you can improve your sims skills by having them spend time practicing different skills. There's several like cooking, playing guitar, charisma, and fitness. The different sims you make can have personality traits that improve their ability to learn different skills but ultimately they have to practice to obtain any of them.

Even though it's a simulation of reality it's probably more honest than actual reality.  The point being, how many times have I tried to tell myself that I just have to find another way to get healthy because the thing I'm doing isn't working. The reality is that it probably is working I just have to keep doing it and keep improving my s…
2 comments
Older Posts >

Warrior 3 FTW

This yoga stuff is starting to really grow on me. Tonight I made it to my third class with the same instructor at 24 hour. I decided to put my mat about halfway back the room right next to the window. There was a little patch of mirror so I could see myself but not the whole time.

I was really surprised at how much I've progressed in such a short time. I think I'm starting to understand the flow of the movement which really helps. I also know where I'm supposed to end up when she calls out a pose like warrior 1, 2, or 3, or low versus high lunge. I was able to actually go into a full warrior 3 pose with my right leg as a base! I held it for probably a good 10 seconds before I started to lose my balance and had to catch myself but I was pretty proud of myself for getting my leg in a straight line behind me.

Then she had us try standing split pose. I'll take my victory with warrior 3 thank you very much!


I still haven't lost any weight, but I am really feeling good a…
Post a Comment
Older Posts >

Why Yes I'd Like Fries With That

Charlotte will be 2 in June. This means that I have been trying for almost 2 years to shed the 40 pounds I gained in pregnancy. I'm halfway there, but these last 20 pounds are a bitch to lose.

So far I've adjusted my diet toward more whole grain and power types of foods like chia seeds, local honey, fruits and vegetables, and healthy oils like coconut and safflower oil. My kitchen pantry is like a showcase of Trader Joes, New Seasons and Bob's Red Mill. I've also been pretty good about going to yoga once a week. But this is obviously inadequate.

I know this isn't particularly profound but I've been realizing that your body is the physical appearance of what you do to take care of it. Exercise tones and shapes it. Healthy foods make it glow. Stress wears it out. Trans-fats make it flubby. Throw in a late-night visit to McDonalds and more than a few trips to starbucks (why would I want it nonfat and sugar free? I don't want to taste the coffee!), a not-so-rec…
Post a Comment
Older Posts >