My Path to Outer Skinniness

Just thought this was amusing for some reason. Dinner tonight was: A small pile of leftover mac & cheese with ham. A small pile of leftover green bean casserole. A larger pile of roasted brussels sprouts. About 8 baby dill pickles. About 5 olives. I'm a gourmet lol!

Okay, this probably isn't going to be the most inspiring, but I have to say that I really enjoyed not having to think for one second about what I ate yesterday. First of all, the pressure on my stomach from the crowding of my insides makes it difficult to eat much, so portion control is on my side. Second, growing a human burns more calories, so even if I eat more than I should (and I do, often) I burn it anyway. SCORE! As I have previously mentioned, I really need to start walking. Bad. I have yet to use the water bottle belt thing I bought. Perhaps my trail isn't blocked anymore and I can go walking there. To make myself feel less guilty about my lack of deliberate walking, I have been walking when shopping - like actually walking, not doddling between displays. The leader of my weight-watchers group was adamant that the walking you do when shopping doesn't count. I beg to differ! Moving is moving say I! Last night we stopped at the very crowded Woodburn Outlet Mall ...

Today I reluctantly weighed myself. Yesterday was a binge-fest that included such classics as waffles, donuts (3 of them), banana cream pie, and oreo cookies. Today is starting to look somewhat similar. Anyway, I wanted the reality check today so as I stepped on the scale I mentally flashed the number 176, 177 in my head. To my surprise it flashed back at me 173. Huh? My baby must be absorbing my calories for me! I can't say that I am actually annoyed with my scale reading..if anything it's good news in spite of myself. What I can say is that I really know better. I know better than to believe that I'm actually healthy with what I've been eating regardless of what the scale says. For the first time in my life I have to use something other than my weight to keep track of my health. This is kind of liberating. However it also gives me that much more responsibility. If I'm not as healthy as I can be, my baby isn't either. The belly keeps growing - I can't b...

Well, it's official. I am starting to kind of show. I have very mixed feelings about this. I have been working so hard to decrease my belly fat for so long that it feels like an epic fail to have it growing. At this point, it just looks like the babies growing has forced more of my belly fat up and out. My tummy is not firm at all and at this point it looks like how it did when I weighed 190 pounds. I have to keep several things in mind. #1 - I have a baby growing in my belly! This is normal! #2 - I haven't actually gained all that much weight. This morning I weighed in at 175. That's about 3.5 pounds which really isn't that bad. #3 - I am short waisted and thus any growing I do has nowhere to go but out. I have bought a few small maternity items to sort of smooth out the transition. The problem with maternity pants that don't have the belly band sewn in is that you can't pull them up very well. I know some of you know what I'm talking about! You s...

Last night I went to the grocery store and got stuff to top salads with. I also got ginger and lemonade for my tummy and a few other items that are on my eating list from my 100 foods book. I think I've had salad the last four days with my meals. While this probably isn't a complete solution for my bad food choices lately, it's a definite step in the right direction. The lady at New Seasons keeps telling me to eat lots of leafy greens for the folic acid so I need to be eating greens even if I have fried chicken in the same day haha I realize I need to be eating more dairy (which is any at all). I tend to avoid it since it's not my favorite. What I really do like though is yogurt. I realized that if I buy yogurt that isn't non-fat that I actually want to eat it. I got brown cow cream top yogurt with fruit on the bottom. It's sweetened with honey and maple rather than sugar. It's so good! I ate two yesterday, which probably isn't so great, but it's b...

Today I ate half a leftover burrito, 3 banana muffins, a bowl of cereal and a chicken sandwich. But when I went through the drive-thru at McDonalds with my nauseated hunger pangs and my strange craving for a $1 chicken sandwich, I made the decision to order the salad. The southwest chicken salad with grilled chicken and no dressing to be more specific. I consider this a win. I've been really bad about remember to think about what I'm going to eat before I eat it. I've been so stressed about how my body feels (my clothes are tight, I feel fat uncomfortable moving around, etc...) that I've been trying to put off my meals until I feel like I have to eat to not be sick. Then by the time I get to food I'm so hungry I eat whatever sounds good cravings included. Well, I'm smarter than that. I know better! So of course I know that I just need to make good choices and eat when I'm hungry - and not way later.

Somehow I've managed to put on more weight in the last few days. I weighed in at 177 this evening. Given, I'd eaten dinner and I always way more in the evening, but this is just plain unacceptable. I feel like a cow. I've noticed that the mentality that I'd built up around food has quickly died. I realize now that I would think quite a bit about what to eat and whether it was what I should have or not. I find myself eating things like tortillas, cheese, pancakes, red meat, and a multitude of other things that I normally don't allow myself to have at all. Pregnant does not equal eat what you want! I bought a waist pack that holds your keys, ipod, phone (or whatever else) and a water bottle to wear when you go walking/running courtesy of a gift certificate to foot traffic from the Run Like Hell. It will be nice because so often I have to figure out ways to carry items when I go walking and end up with bulging pockets. I am trying to be better about walking as often...

I feel like I weight 190 pounds again. It's hard to breathe when I move around. I get winded from walking or climbing stairs. My pants are getting tighter. I feel uncomfortable in my own body! The scale was only at 173.3 this morning. What the hell?! This is a bit of a gain - around 2 pounds - and I'm trying not to stress about small weight gains at this point because I'm pregnant for crying out loud. But I don't want to feel like I've gained more weight that I actually have! My eating has to be better. Period. I need to start walking. Period. This is not an option. I only get one shot to have this baby be a healthy baby. Balls.