My Path to Outer Skinniness

I wish this post had as much positive enthusiasm as the last, but it's been kind of a difficult week. I woke up this morning with a mild headache feeling like I had a hangover. I couldn't think straight and  just felt worn out. I put in for a sub for the morning and went back to bed. After some cold brew and Tylenol I forced myself to teach my afternoon classes, but I'm tired and still feel the pressure on my skull. Yesterday I woke up in a rage. Rage over the grocery shopping I spent the ENTIRE weekend trying to take care of. Rage over the food I couldn't eat to calm the rage. Rage over how I can't control anyone but myself. Rage over the stupidly over-positive encouraging crap in the day-to-day book I've been using. Shut up book! I'm mad and I want to be mad! I don't want to be told how I can fix it! I just want to be mad! These seem to be the monologues that keep going around and around in my head. Angry Feminist Monologue When did all of the g...

Today was an important day. Today, just now actually, I realized that my energy levels might be better. Here's a highlights list of things I did today: got up when my alarm went off - wut? ate breakfast at my desk rather than at my kitchen counter where I... updated the opera on tap website prepped and packed my lunches for the rest of the week made a phone call I'd been putting off to the dress/tuxedo company  packed and put return dresses in my car to take to the post office re-taped numbers on my middle school students' chairs (helps me yell at them more efficiently - you go to chair 10!) wrote a sight-singing exercise on the board 15 minutes before my students showed up (usually doing this when they walk in) ate kale salad while teaching my class and didn't cave and show a video updated the lcrmea website sent an email about solo and ensemble got my paperwork turned in to set up my account so I could send the email about solo and ensemble rewrote a s...

I'm five days into my second whole30 and I am thrilled at how much easier it has been than the first round! Here are some ways that it has been better: I have pretty much memorized what foods I can and can't have this time so it's much easier to shop and plan.  I have a clear plan with my kids that helps me stress a lot less about how to include them.  I established a lot of food routines the first time and can just replicate my breakfast and lunch plans now. I know better which restaurants I can eat at and how to plan for what I can eat.  I am a lot more gracious with myself because I know I don't have to be perfect to get good results. I also know that these restrictions will not last forever and that I haven't said goodbye the croissants and chocolate for the rest of my life. It doesn't feel as permanent this time as it did last time. (sorta like a first pregnancy versus a second one) Considering what a junk-food junkie I was the weeks leading up t...

Happy New Year! I am so relieved to see 2017 come to a close. It was a long, tough, satisfying year and I am happy to be done. I think the two things that were the most life changing last year were moving into our new house and the first Whole30 I completed. It's been four months since I finished my first Whole30. I remember my delightful barista, Kristina, saying "It's so hard, but so worth it." And I couldn't describe it better. I have tried so many things to lose weight and keep it off and nothing has ever permeated my consciousness like this has. I think about what I'm eating basically always. I haven't gained any of the weight back that I lost even though I haven't considered myself on a diet since September. I am also hyper-aware of how foods affect me. December was sort of a free-fall. We went to Disneyland and I made the conscious decision to enjoy myself. Disneyland is already a sugar wonderland most of the year, but add in the Christmas t...

It's been a long month since I finished my Whole 30 in August. I've had SO much going on but I really wanted to take the time to reflect on the changes I've experienced since I completed my first Whole 30 round. First of all, I lost a total of 16 pounds over the course of the month. I've since lost 4 more. I weighed myself a few days ago fully expecting that I had put weight back on. I have not even been close to eating anything that resembles the food I was eating on plan. I was shocked that I hadn't gained any weight. So shocked that I kept moving the scale to make sure it wasn't stuck on something because I couldn't believe it. I feel a lot better without the extra pounds on my body. I've been having so many back problems, and I can't afford the co-pay with my chiropractor right now, so I've been doing a lot of stretching and twisting. I imagine that it would be so much worse if I was still carrying an extra 20 pounds of body weight on my ...

I made it and I couldn't write about it because I couldn't find the mouse for my computer. I still haven't found it, but I borrowed a stand-in until I can find the real mouse. I strongly recommend that you don't do a whole 30 while you're moving. It was incredibly hard. It's still incredibly hard. We got pizzas for our moving helpers and I couldn't eat a bite of it. I was bitter. Especially when I had to go pick up the pizzas and drive them around. I had a celebratory glass of white wine and a bunch of tater tots at McMenamins on the final day. It also happened to be the second day of school and we had an Opera on Tap show (which I did not have to deal with my kids at). I was in a VERY good mood all evening. I weighed myself the same morning and discovered I'd lost 12 pounds. I also feel like I'm less bloated and gassy, my skin looks great, I've had much more even hormonal shifts, and I feel like I'm less anxious and reactive. So...pretty...